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Cake day: February 22nd, 2026

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  • jtrek@startrek.websiteto196@lemmy.blahaj.zone•Couldn't agree more
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    22 hours ago

    I don’t know how other men are but generally when I see someone (of any genre) there’s like an automatic evaluation - not in words or conscious - that flags like “are they a threat? Are they hot?” and a bunch of other stuff. It’s just part of the “what am I looking at?” reflex in the brain.

    But I don’t, like, linger on it. Don’t play out in my head what sex would be like, or how to defend myself if they pulled a knife, or whatever.

    To make a computer metaphor, some attributes are eagerly loaded and others lazily. I think attractiveness is eagerly loaded.

    Also I’m comfortable enough not to feel threatened by finding people attractive.

    I had a friend that, when talking about this, seemed like their brain didn’t eagerly load the same things. They didn’t “know” if someone was hot until they thought about it, and were confused how that information was just there for me.






  • Different parts of NY state are all very different. Even different neighborhoods within Brooklyn can be very different costs and experiences. I live here but would not willingly choose to live in the suburbs around the city.

    In the city, you’re likely not going to find rent under $1000/month. Make a budget spreadsheet. You can cut some corners - my phone bill is $20/month, and I eat a lot of rice and beans to keep my food budget low - but some stuff is just expensive.

    You’ll probably need room mates.

    Look for colleges first, if that’s a goal. Some have housing assistance.





  • I just had a flashback to one of my first office jobs.

    They had weekly reporting that needed to be done, and someone non-technical had been assigned to do it. They had like gone into the database and copy-pasted records into excel, and the whole operation took a full day.

    I was like, “Hold on. What? You know you can script all of this, right?”

    Luckily my boss liked me, and let me go ahead. Changed the task into an hour, including making whatever charts and slide-deck management wanted that month.

    Though I do wonder if sometimes doing things badly is a weird pro-labor move- They get paid the same if they take all day versus an hour, so why bother speeding it up?





  • jtrek@startrek.websiteto196@lemmy.blahaj.zone•Dating rule
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    4 days ago

    It’s a disgrace what capitalism has done to dating apps.

    Used to be you could put in a lot of free text, and search for whatever you wanted. Get the unadulerated list sorted by match percent.

    Now it’s all opaque algorithm bullshit. Fuck 'em. These executives have blood and misery on their hands.



  • People use the word “capitalism” to mean different things.

    If you ask someone “Should someone who doesn’t do any work get money from people who do?”, a lot of people would say no. And they’d probably think you’re talking about welfare or communism. But that’s capitalism. The guy who “owns” the company can sit at home and watch netflix while all his office workers make stuff, and he keeps the profits. If you frame it right, you can get people to agree with you or suffer some cognitive dissonance.

    But none of that is what some people are thinking of when they think capitalism. They think “free markets” and “competition”. They often don’t really think about how that trends towards monopolies or cartels. Either because of magic, or “the government will prevent monopolies.” But not too much regulation. There’s got to be a few decades of suffering before an intervention, typically.

    There’s also a lot of binary thinking. Either capitalism, or total state ownership and oppression.