I’m sure they can’t be there to ‘save water’, as they auto flush as soon as you stand up, knowing good and well you still gotta wipe your ass and flush again anyways…
You stand up to wipe your ass?
Some people sit, some people stand. Most of the time, neither side is aware of the other side’s existence, and also cannot comprehend how they manage to do it that way.
I can’t even reach for the TP without the damn toilet auto-flushing and getting my balls wet with toilet water. Why the hell would I even think to try wiping while sitting down?
Because it’s harder to reach my ass standing up. Plus, I don’t want my ass cheeks to come together and smear the shit around. Sounds like the sensitivity of the units needs adjustment.
Last time the great Sit Vs Stand Debate reared its head (on the site we left behind), iirc standers were in the minority, but not by much. I don’t understand the mechanics of standing to wipe.
Surely standing smooshes the buttcheeks together? Like trying to clean a window with the blinds down
It isn’t a full stand, just like a squat above the toilet. Asscheeks still very much apart, ready to receive paper.
Asscheeks still very much apart, ready to receive paper
No idea why this read for me like a response to a drill sergeant.
“WHAT’S THIS, MAGGOT? ARE YOU FULLY STANDING UP TO WIPE YOUR DIRTY ASS, RECRUIT?!”
“SIR, NO SIR! ASS CHEEKS VERY MUCH APART, READY TO RECEIVE PAPER, SIR!”
I feel like Standers have not been clear all this time, sounds like the manoeuvre is more of a crouch! Which makes far more sense than bumcheek-smooshing a fresh poop remainder.
more of a foward heave really
If it helps to know, you mainly stand with your legs, depending on your technique, your head can stay at pretty much the same height ras it was when you were sitting, sort of an upward ass salute.
I sit so this is just a guess, but I imagine they use one hand to hold one cheek apart, and the other to wipe? Otherwise yea I feel like it would make more of a mess lol
The mysterious world of the other side of the toilet stall… you’re sat there pooing like a normal human being, meanwhile in the next stall someone is stood over their own pants, pulling their bumcheeks apart one at a time for what could only ever be a half-wipe. Strange & inefficient.
Well I’m not sure how everyone else goes about it, but I’ve always found it easier to stand and wipe front to back, I dunno about all that sitting down or sideways wiping stuff.
Probably helps that I’m a reasonably slender guy though, it’s not difficult or messy at all for me… 🤷♂️
sideways wiping
Excuse me?
Hahahaha. Every statement OP makes just leads to more questions.
This shit just goes deeper and deeper. What’s kept wipe on, wipe off?
This shit just goes deeper and deeper.
That’s probably why we need so many techniques.
Sitting makes it hard to properly position the paper without accidentally dipping it in the poopy water.
This just leaves me more confused. What sort of toilet are you using, where your anus is close enough to the water that you might accidentally dip your paper in? Are you pooing in ponds?
That’s the other debate. Wipe with arm reaching under, or around the back?
I guess the answer to that will be dependant on flexibility and arm length. I’m an around-the-back-er, can’t imagine reaching underneath… feels like it’d be more of a push than a wipe, but then I don’t have very long arms afaik (I kept seeing people with v long reach in MMA bouts, decided to measure my reach, was mildly disappointed to not have long arms).
Gotta make sure the poo is smooth and even on each cheek before wiping.
I’m not sure if you’re trying to be silly or not, but how would a person wipe their ass while sitting? Especially on a public auto-flush toilet, where even so much as reaching for the toilet paper causes the toilet to flush and get my junk wet with toilet water…
I lean to one side, which lifts one butt cheek enough to reach my ass. Keeps the butt cheeks spread apart. I’ve never had one flush before I stood up.
Okay, but that still doesn’t answer why would you do that while the toilet is auto-flushing?
It’s unavoidable with these damn things, just so much as reaching for the TP triggers them to flush, getting my junk wet with toilet water. And they flush with the power of a pressure washer, meaning water is spraying everywhere in the bowl.
Act like I wanna get my hands wet trying to wipe while the damn thing inevitably starts the auto-flush… F all that, just let manually flush when I’m done.
I’ve never experienced the toilet auto flushing just from me leaning over. Maybe I’m just lucky that all the toilets I’ve used have been properly calibrated for use, and yours haven’t for some reason.
My experiences are the same as yours. The only time I’ll get an auto flush while sitting is if I lean forward too far
Define ‘too far’…
For these toilets around my area, you’d have to be Stretch Armstrong and literally stretch your arm out to get some TP without triggering the sensor.
Yeah I tend to agree with the comments saying it’s probably something of a calibration issue, but they all seem to do that ☹️
AquaVantage with Zurn wall mounted sensors here, if it counts for anything.
It’s been hit and miss for me. Sometimes I’ll lean forward to get circulation back into my legs and it’ll flush. Other times, I’ve had to press the little manual flush button before I leave the stall.
Oh, okay, I get you. Yeah these damn things here are set on a hair trigger, so to speak ☹️
Whereabouts are you? Different countries have different porcelain setups. What toilet are you using where your junk is over the water input? Do you have a magnum dong and balls?
What pisses me off more about toilets like this are the auto-off taps, they set the auto-off almost instantly. So you need to be pressing it down with one hand whilst doing some sort of meditation-esque ‘one hand clapping’ to clean the other. What do I have, three hands? Prob not an issue for you, as you can just hold it down with your magnum dong.
I’m in the USA, Gulf Coast area. Most of the auto-flush toilets around here have no tank and a wall mounted optical sensor. But if you’re not sitting pretty much upright (as in leaning forward to get some toilet paper), the stupid sensor will trigger.
And it’s not even so much about the size of my package, it’s about the water pressure. When they flush, it’s about similar to a pressure washer, which ends up splashing water all around and up into the bowl. I’m pretty sure it would even get a lady’s bits wet with toilet water with the pressure they use ☹️
Ahh I see, it’s like a nasty unwanted bidet. An unwelcome germ shower across the entire backside, nobody wants that!
I mean, it’s the internet, someone somewhere probably wants that.
Those taps have an o-ring inside which is supposed to slowly release giving you time to wash your hands. When they turn off immediately it’s because the part has worn and needs to be replaced.
So it’s not a cost-saving, water-reducing exercise, merely lack of maintenance? Interesting.
I can’t phase my hand into the seat, so yeah.
Neither do I lol. I lean to the side to lift one cheek.
Ah. There’s the difference. Standing up is easier/safer for me than leaning to the side.
Because there are a ton of jerks that don’t flush.
This was what I remember about the US restrooms before the auto-flush mechanisms came. 30-50% of the stalls in a ladies room would be unflushed and people would occasionally take their chances flushing it with their foot to get an unflushed one back in use if there was a line. Nice places had someone walk through the bathroom and flush everything, refill the paper towels and wipe down the sinks occasionally. Really nice places had people stationed in the bathroom full-time but they often expected $1-5 in tip for handing you a paper towel. Fuck, I’m only 40 but I’m old.
True enough, but can’t they put the auto-flush thing on a one minute delay or so, at least give me a bit to wipe my ass first?
So the next person comes in and finds the toilet unflushed?
One. Minute. Delay.
It’s gonna take at least that long for me to wipe and get my pants back up anyways, I’m pretty sure that thing would have done flushed by the time I leave the stall.
Better yet, set the auto-flush to trigger when I open the stall door to leave, problem solved.
Nahb make it 20s and display a huge countdown on the stall door. If it’s too fast for you, you can reset it, by pressing the seat down. 😆
I get that you’re being silly LOL, but a seat pressure sensor ain’t a half bad idea either.
Maybe also horns/sirens, for the visually impaired 🤣
Too much, i know 😅
Don’t forget the emergency flare 👍
Common curtesy goes a long way,
Common curtesy cannot be found today,
Auto flush will take the mess away.
lean forward, it’s the poor man’s bidet.
LOL, cute response! 👍
I do hope you’ve read over at least some of the other comments though.
Are you saying you stand up and then wipe your ass? Like/// really? Holy shit.
Apparently about half of people do this.
Half of all people in the world squish their shit tangling on their sphincter between their ass cheeks before they wipe?
It’s less than half.
There are also the people that don’t wipe at all.
Truly living on the edge.
Let’s not forget those that bring a cup of water and just rinse. shudder
There’s a technique to it which not everyone is skilled enough to employ.
Yeah, its called remaining seated until you wipe your ass.
I do a mix. First couple are sit down wipes, then stand up to finish. If you’re getting it from multiple angles you’re less likely to have skid marks.
they auto flush as soon as you stand up, knowing good and well you still gotta wipe your ass
Wait, you stand up to wipe? Why?
Because I don’t want my hand wet with toilet water, duh. Please read the other comments, you can’t even reach for the toilet paper before it starts flushing, while you’re still on the toilet…
Convenience and some people forget.
True that. But they could like put them on a delay timer to give me a minute to wipe and pull my pants up or something…
Auto flushing is also not consistent – it really depends on the toilet. I’ve seen some that are very good, doesn’t flush until you get up, and others that are so bad they flush while you’re sitting on it.
I feel like they should tie the auto flush sensor to the door hinge, since any movement there indicates no ones actively sitting on the toilet. Unless you’re one of those people who refuse to the lock the door…
Thank you! Fully agreed, door sensor FTW!
You can tell this isn’t Reddit because the bidet squad hasn’t shown up.
deleted by creator
And then blow dry
LMFAO!
More sanitary not touching others poopy surfaces, and otherwise some people wouldn’t flush.
How is it any more sanitary when the damn thing triggers the auto-flush just by reaching for the toilet paper? Done got my balls wet with toilet water now…
I’d much rather just have manual flush, or at least give me a minute delay so I can wipe my ass first without getting my junk wet.
No hand contact is why it’s more sanitary. And what sort of toilet do you use that sprays your balls? The ones I’ve used haven’t triggered when I’ve reached for the toilet paper either. (When still sitting down)
AquaVantage with Zurn wall mounted sensors. The water pressure itself is what ends up splashing the water all around and up to my junk. You gotta be quick to get up off these things to avoid getting your ass wet.
That sounds more like a bad design than a flaw with all auto flush toilets.
Of course, can’t say I’ve shat in every brand out there. But this seems to be a common issue in my area with basically all toilets made by AquaVantage/Zurn…
We have the opposite problem where I live. The auto-flush barely ever works, and more often than not nowadays the manual flush is a tiny button you have to actively search for to find.
Having cleaned toilets before, it’s because a startling amount of people don’t flush. In a high school, I’d say about half the kids from the 1980s didn’t, so I can’t imagine they started as adults. In companies I have worked for with auto-flushes, I have rarely seen a mess left in the bowl, but companies that don’t about half the time as well.
True that, and I totally respect the idea of auto-flush, but I also feel it’s ignorantly designed and poorly implemented.
Why are many of them so sensitive? Around my area, most of them will flush while you’re still sitting down because you reached a few inches for the toilet paper.
Why are they so quick to flush? Why not put them on a one minute delay timer to give people a moment to wipe? Plus that would often save an unnecessary extra flush for the used toilet paper.
Or just set the auto-flush on a sensor on the door lock instead, that way it flushes when you leave the stall, not the moment a stupid sensor thinks you stood up.
You might be interested to skim over the rest of the comment thread, I think it made for an interesting conversation haha! 🚽
I put a small piece of toilet paper over the sensor. Problem solved, and now I can flush at my leisure.
Sounds good on paper (a little pun intended LOL), but the sensors are on the wall here, nothing to lay the paper over.
I guess a piece of tape would work, but like who TF carries tape in their pockets when they gotta drop a load?
Back when I was a student, the auto-flush sensors on the toilets at my university were so sensitive that I could trigger an accidental flush just by leaning forward about 10°. Just the subtle variations in my normal sitting posture could sometimes trigger as many as five flushes before I even started wiping. It was so bad I started carrying a pad of post-it notes in my pocket so I could cover the sensor before sitting down.
Didn’t always work. My previous employer had them on a timer. If they thought you were taking too long, it would start flushing, then again, then more frequently. So yeah, time to stand up for a couple minutes before resuming pooping.
Actually, yet another reason for using the handicapped stall. Sorry guys, but there’s room to standup and even turn around, there’s a hook to keep anything off the floor, and it doesn’t have the timer. At some point the regular stalls became unusable
I’ll be honest, if my employer did that kind of shit to the toilet, I’d start using the trash can instead. I wouldn’t even care if they fired me, I wouldn’t want to work there anyways.
Now on that same note, if it’s taking an employee over 10 minutes to drop a load, they’re very possibly just goofing off on the phone or something, and that ain’t cool.
Gotcha 👍
Electrical tape it is…
Bring back foot pedals!
You mean gas and brake pedals? Or are we going for a clutch pedal as well?..
Okay, nifty simple mechanism, I like it 👍
I usually prefer my toilet with a toilet seat though haha! 😂🤣
Someone will smear shit over the flush handle. Either because they’re an asshole or because things went horribly, horribly wrong.
As someone who saves water at home, I feel wasting a little bit in the name of me-not-having-to-deal-with-someone-else’s-shit is a perfectly reasonable use.
I definitely respect the intent of the things, but can’t they like put them on a one minute delay or something? Like, give me a moment to grab some TP, wipe and pull my pants up first?
As long as I don’t have to deal with someone else’s shit, it’s fine by me.
