Finally something Onion-worthy from Finland, I guess!
No different that any other cryonics grifter. They even tend to operate as morticians to avoid legal scrutiny.
Why steal from living people when you can bilk their estate when they’re dead?
Scandinavian media reports it was his parents who passed away in 1994 and 1995. I suspect he would inherit their estate anyways. Reportedly there was an investigation surrounding one of the deaths, as the local priest said no funeral had been performed, but the Doc claimed the body was shipped out of the country for it’s burial.
I’m quite curious about this idea that cryonics is something bad, care to explain?
The short version is even the seemingly well-meaning ones are making or alluding to promises they just can’t keep.
The key problem with cryonics is that water expands into ice crystals when frozen, and the human body is 70% water. Tissues, including critical brain tissue, are destroyed. Dessication before freezing would also cause damage. Some firms say they have the secret sauce or are close to it, but nobody has answered this question AFAIK.
And then there’s the longevity. These facilities claim to be able to run decades or even centuries, without failure, but that is an extremely high bar regardless of how much money you throw at it. Power fluctuations and equipment failure take their toll. There are already stories of cadavers turning into soup in their care.
I have never heard of a cryonic institute claiming it’s all safe and ok?
The idea is to flush out as much water as possible/prevent ice crystal forming and as that doesn’t work well enough, repair said damage in the future.
Just FYI to everyone reading this, this tech works and is used already, but only for small items like a rats liver. Much work in the biotech industry is aimed to make this work for larger items like human organs, which would be a boon for everyone (IIRC way over 50% of donated organs are discarded because the organ decayes during transport & storage). The next step, the full body of course.
Keeping a cryopreserved item cold is simple, we do it already all day long.
Okay so sure, maybe it won’t work, maybe the power goes out long enough to make it go bad etc, but people are aware of this and most sane people think it’s that or nothing. Better a 10% chance than zero. So I just don’t get the virulent posts always surfacing when talking about cryonics.
How To With John Wilson, ironically, has an episode that goes deep into one of these cults. The general idea is that people give up their estates and take out a life insurance policy in the company’s name to pay for this
E: it’s called How To Track Your Package
Well, do they get cryopreserved or not?
They do, for most it’s just their head
Why else would anyone put something in the freezer?
To create a solid for easier cutting or slicing!
To make a cold thing that can be used to cool other things!
The future looks pretty grim folks. Good to be prepared.
Finally something Onion-worthy
Not surprising that we have turkulaises to thank for it.
Turku, the Florida of Finland.
Fucking re-sellers.
