I don’t understand why you don’t just put the kids in the helicopter and fly them up to Grandpa’s condo?

Universal Pictures bought the rights to make Lego movies, but that didn’t include the rights to any of the popular characters from The Lego Movie or its spin-offs. Those stayed with Warner Brothers (even though WB can no longer use Lego, so those characters are functionally dead).

Universal also didn’t get the rights to any of the franchise characters typically associated with Lego, so they can’t use Boba Fett, or Batman, or Gandalf, or Harry Potter, or even Jack Sparrow.

So they’re sitting on this huge IP and have no way to actually use it. And so Pharrell comes along and says he wants to make a documentary about himself, and they say nah that’s boring, nobody wants to see that. Then someone realizes they’re going to lose the rights to Lego if they don’t make a movie with them soon. And here we are.

Bring back the stockade for shit like this.

Now please turn to song 146 in your hymnals, The Cat Cameth Back.

Maybe it’s time to admit that you are bad at this and you should do something else besides trying to run a business. It’s clearly not your forte.

This is pretty good satire, and I gotta give you props for sticking to the bit, LunchMoneyThief.

Happy workers stay longer and don’t leave rotting fish in the vents right before quitting out of frustration.

Only a person who thinks on a single axis could possibly believe the two parties are the same in any meaningful way. Reality is more complex than that.

Gary Whittington, the man he shot, was a Republican and major financial backer of both of George W. Bush’s election campaigns.

So

This isn’t an endorsement of Harris. It’s an anti-endorsement of Trump.

Give it to me.

Well that’s pretty rude. Kathy Bates is an attractive person and doesn’t deserve this kind of slander.

I hope you’re referring to the unfinished compilation Salmon of Doubt as the sixth, and not that weak sub-fanfic tripe by Eoin Colfer.

Lamb was great! Really does a fantastic job of highlighting the hypocrisy inherent in modern religious constructs.

Godel, Escher, Bach
Infinite Jest
The Lord of the Rings
The Demon-Haunted World
The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy
Slaughterhouse-Five
Small Gods
Master and Commander

and everything else written by those authors.

The first two or three on that list might take several fits and starts to get through, YMMV, but they are WELL worth the effort, and you will come out the other side changed by the experience. The others are all pretty easily digestible, but no less transformative.

That they hate America? Yeah, I gathered that.

Hey Nikki? Hey, maybe that’s not a good thing. Maybe that’s something you shouldn’t be happy about, and something you should push back against if you actually care about your party or your country.

What’s that? You only care about your own skin?

Physically, anyway. Mentally? Depends on how late in the evening it is.

A sound bite of him soiling himself on mic would be fun.

Saddest thing is nobody is going to watch this who hasn’t already decided.

The people who voted for him in the last two elections, who would gladly lick the diaper leakage dribbling down his leg off his lifted loafers, will not watch this. They will watch the clips of Fox News sycophants highlighting the two or three gotcha lines and declare him the victor, regardless of his performance.

People on the fence will tune it out, as they have everything else, because they are absolute fucking morons who don’t give a shit about anything outside their own sight line.

Harris supporters will confirm that she is a competent orator and debater who won against a gibbering human suitcase full of soiled laundry, and nothing will change.