Because no one watches cooking shows anymore.

That’s how gym memberships have worked forever.

With a mouse jiggler, you can control your status manually, even from your phone while you’re in bed. Away at five, Busy at nine, Available when I’m actually at the keyboard only if necessary.

Nan’s old world recipe for groin worm marsala

Erection.

What are they surviving on? It ain’t like I got a pantry of snacks hidden in my groin.

I think most dog guardians in the USA are just poorly prepared. Never been to basic obedience training, or further than that: urban canine training. Socializing the pup doesn’t happen, so they freak out at the sight of another living thing. Leash optional when no one is looking. Or, even worse, the dog basically lives inside the kennel when the human is out, so it’s more like a prisoner/warden relationship.

That’s some good sarcasm.

Lightning breaks the rest of the joke. Butterbugs?

Maybe wings vibrate at a certain frequency so you tune that out? It’s the CIA, they aren’t necessarily trying to preserve quality for a trial.

Good way to fake your death and ensure your student gets famous. Win-win.

They rounded down, she’s actually 9017 years old.

But… I’ve had big strawbs that taste amazing?

No crying in the casino.

Really Excellent Thinking Alpha Republican Dudes Society

No, but it makes room for places like Black Rifle Coffee Company to take market share.

St Gumy

Rub it.

Maui Vera works pretty well for me. Keep using it for like a week though, don’t stop after day two.

Who gives a shit, they’re both fairy tales.