I guess I choose Denmark or maybe Portugal. Having USA and Russia being superpowers has been real shit.
Can communicate with any animal
But they can’t communicate with you
Haha imagine trying to explain that to people.
“I have a superpower, I can speak to animals they just can’t speak back”
“But everyone has that superpower, I can do that too”
“Yeh but I’m actually really talking to them, like in their language that they can understand”
“How do you know?”
“…”
I mean, you can ask an animal to do some arbitrary action specified by the other person, and then the animal (hopefully) does it. This side effect isn’t great, but it definitely still leaves some real usefulness.
Telling my dog as I go to the garage, “I’ll be back in literally one minute.” and being understood would rock.
But the thing is, if they do the thing you asked in a way where it’s noticeable that they only did it because you asked, then they are signalling to you that they understood, which is a form of communication and the word used was “communicate” with animals.
First, the use of “communicate” in the original superpower description is presumably referring to communication that couldn’t happen without the power - and the side effect uses the same term. As it stands, my dog can tell me she understands I intend to walk her by jumping off the back of the couch and being excited at the door.
So if the superpower only refers to novel communication, I’d interpret that to mean anything more than I could reasonably communicate to my dog, and more than she could communicate to me (confirmation of understanding).
If the side effect, despite using the same verb, actually renders animals LESS able to communicate with me than they already can, that seems an especially uncharitable interpretation.
Alternatively, I can ask the animal to wait until I was out of the room before performing the action for the third party. At that point, only that third party would end up communicating having seen the comprehension/performance.
Well thought out lol. You should get a genie, I think you’ll be prepared.
I appreciate the sentiment, but probably not. The genie would just scoff af my argument and say nothing was guaranteed to be “fair” about the situation. My only saving grace in talking about it here is that fellow humans are more likely to share a similar base point for reasoning.
Oh damn. You got me bad on that one.
Magically summon pizza whenever I want
but only anchovy and pineapple pizza
instantly renaming a large city
But you have to name it after the person you hate the most.
Reading minds
But you have to start at the beginning.
Being a cat
You make noise every time you walk
I’ll stick with the strongest superpower of them all, I am Cables Never Tangle Man!
But you cannot tie knots anymore. Even worse - every knot you touch magically slips open. Be careful not to trip over your shoelaces!
Velcro has entered the chat…
So many tiny little knots
It’s going to look like a shag rug as soon as they touch it
Teleportation!
But you have to go through TSA every time
Teleportation
But you lose one of your socks every time you teleport and they’re like really cool unique ones that only work as a pair. Heartbreaking.
Butt stuff is marginally less fun.
The power to talk to women without staring at their feet.
In long-dead languages they can’t understand
Super good luck ala Domino of the X-Men.
It’s good luck for the first half of your life, then its bad luck the second half
One day, your luck will reverse, and you know you have hit your halfway point. Before, you survived everything because of your good luck. Now, survival is a curse you cannot escape until your appointed time.
Switch sexes any time I prefer
… provided you are playing Uno and have a reverse card.
The United States of America after the Cold War.
But you live in Afghanistan
Fall asleep at any time and place by will
It is impossible to wake up until you are fully rested, including by alarm, fire, or intruder.
I either wake up rested or not my problem anymore.
Immunity from all replies to this post.
But you are incredibly smart. BOOM GOTEM.
