As the title says, how often do you admit you’re wrong? Is it different when it’s a factual dispute versus something more subjective?
I make an effort to concede early if I’m in error. I think because my mother almost never admits fault. She’ll fall back to “that’s not what I meant” or similar deflections first, and that’s really annoying.
The last big factual error I made was about the distance of walking, and that’s where I learned about Taxicab Geometry ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Taxicab_geometry ).
I think some people believe admitting fault is a sign of weakness, but I find it’s more of a power move. It takes strength to do it, and people can tell when you’re sweating and desperate. Usually it leads to resolving the conflict faster and cheaper, too.
(I expect some people will feel the urge to reply they’re never wrong. I’ll file that under never admits fault.)
I can’t think of a single time someone has admitted to having been wrong about something and me thinking less of them because it. It’s always the opposite yet it’s still so painful being in that spot yourself.
I was talking about this with someone a while ago and they suggested that some people’s lived experiences have been more… abusive. Like as a child if they made a mistake their parents treated them like shit. Now they have that untreated trauma deep in their personality. When they make a mistake like making a reservation at the wrong time, they subconsciously think it’s going to be like when their dad screamed at them, smacked them, and sent them to bed without dinner. So they lie and prevaricate to avoid that.
I don’t know how often that kind of early childhood trauma is the root of the behavior, but if that is happening that’s really sad.
I have my suspicions that my ex is like this because of bad parenting.
When my baby nephew tries to stack his stacking rings, my family praises him even if he has the order wrong. It’s how babies learn.
I suspect that people who can’t admit when they’re wrong had parents who told them not to do a task unless they could do it right the first time
Never had someone with a martyr complex “admit to being wrong” about something completely inconsequential or stupid? If so, I envy you.