How about an adolescent kangaroo?
Most beasts under 80 lbs. Over 80 lbs, it’s gonna be on a case by case basis. 90 lb sloth, no problem. 81 lb wolf, …problem.
The biggest animal I feel confident in is an 800 lb human. Huge, but that fucker’s gonna be exhausted ten seconds into the fight.
Just be careful he doesn’t roll onto you.
I tried to scream, but my mouth was full of flab.
Just run around them until they collapse.
Rule one: cardio
Your mom!
A blue whale. (they won’t fight back b/c they don’t consider me a threat, and so when they wander away I win by technicality)
I call foul play, there was no “taking on” just “swimming near”
Punch ones, they don’t react and swim away, you win by default
They brushed it slightly
A giant squid. It would have to be on land though (you never said we had to do it in their natural habitat).
Probably a fainting goat.
Sunfish.
They are enormous wastes of flesh and evolutionary effort.
If I had bear hands then probably a small bear.
A blue whale, as long as we’re on land.
Definitely something smaller than a grasshopper… Lost that fight a few days ago.
T-Rex. I mean, all I gotta do is remove one pin and the whole skeleton collapses.
My 3.4lb rabbit recently decided I am not a threat and started chilling in the middle of my walkway at night. She now takes multiple shoves to make move. So, not a bunny
(This took years of work on trust I am mostly bragging my bunny loves me)
None, I would think how bad I felt if I hurt the cute furry friend, then tried to pet them instead and get mauled.
I could totally take a 6-year-old human.
fuck off those things are animals
Galapagos tortoise. That’s the largest I can think of without teeth and claws, not fast, and not in water.
I mean, it’s got a shell, and turles/tortoises can still bite pretty bad without teeth, consider the snapping turtle.
A turtle is a good idea.
A shell is a great defense against a biting predator, but not great against a thinking / tool-using predator.
To be fair, since it was specified that one must fight the animal with one’s bare hands, tool use is probably cheating here
Bare hands doesn’t necessarily mean “only punches”. You can’t pick up a rock if there’s one on the ground? To me “with your bare hands” means going into the fight without preparation, with your hands empty originally. No guns, no swords, no rocket artillery. Like, you were out for a hike and a ________ attacked you.
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A large opossum. I could probably handle something larger, but I can only handle one pet at a time and I like opossums.
Yes, I understand you’re asking about the largest animal I can fight and I’m telling you that that opossum is going to become a pet if I win.
