You’ve missed out the Scottish snow badger. Like the regular European badger but about a third larger and completely white to blend into their (now disappearing) snowy highland habitats.
They are the sole reason hard plastic shell ski boots were invented after it was found that snow badgers have no problem biting through the old leather ski boots we used to use.
They hibernate through the summer months and only come out to hunt during the winter so it’s very hard to get a photo of them.

Easy rider

When making mac and cheese just cook the pasta in milk, then when it’s ready add in the grated cheddar, mozzarella and cream cheese and stir. Job done.

I gave my wife a ring made out of coconut. Cost me $2 and she instantly dropped it off the balcony if the resturaunt we were at. The Thai owner of the place climbed off the balcony into the boulder field underneath and spent 20 minutes looking for it. Even after I explained that it was only a cheap coconut ring. He said the price isn’t the point, it’s the memories!
He found it, what a legend.

‘what fills the gap’ in my ass - will cady

I have had life changing injuries. I broke my shoulder in 6 places and needed surgery to put it back together. This meant I lost my job as a carer at a nursing home because I could no longer move patients (out of bed, picking them off the floor, washing them etc) and it took almost three years for me to get full use of my arm again.
I have all the strength back now after all the physio but will never have the full range of movement because they had to shave the socket deeper when rebuilding it, this means that when climbing overhangs that traverse to the right I struggle a bit, but it’s a challenge to overcome not a reason to give up.
I don’t look forward to how much all these injuries might hurt when I’m older but in my opinion it is all the more reason to enjoy life while I can, being old and sore is going to happen whether I like it or not, might as well have some good memories.

Probably not what you were thinking but there’s plenty of stories of dogs not leaving their owners after death like Greyfriars bobby.
Also elephants are known for mourning their dead.
I think if I donated my body to science and they were all done with it, and they could make more money for research by selling bits off to weirdos that would be fine by me. Maybe put a little QR code on it that people could scan and get a little biography of me. That would probably make archeology a lot easier.

Reminds me of the writing of David wrong / Jason pargin who wrote the John dies at the ends series of books.

I don’t see the problem. Loads of people have skulls of other animals on display. Why should a human be treated any different.

A lot of people have said that I’m really unlucky, but I’m still skiing, climbing and biking. A disturbing number of my friends have broken their spines at one point or another or have a ridiculous amount of metal holding them up, so I consider myself very lucky indeed.
Also very grateful for the NHS.

It’s a throw up between dislocating my arm while kiting and wearing both wrist straps for the brake lines. So my arm dislocated in mid air, fell to the ground, kite inflates but doesn’t take off and dragged me along the ground by my dislocated shoulder until I hit a rock.
Falling while climbing solo breaking my ankle and having to crawl out to find help.
And finally crashing while skiing and landing my hip on a rock, the ski patrol didn’t know if I had a spinal injury and couldn’t give me painkillers to get me off the hill, so they took me down a slushy bumpy spring slope on a sledge. Turns out I’d just fractured my hip so after the xray my friends dad the doctor got me loaded up with painkillers to make up for it.
Edit: that’s just some of the worst I can think of, I am very grateful that the human mind cannot remember pain.

Been in several car accidents. Rolled a car down a hill. Was hit by a car and went over the bonnet, roof and landed on my feet behind the car bruised but OK.
Got run over by another car dislocated my knee and my heel burst open, the lady in the car gave me about 20 chocolate penguin biscuits for the shock, then I got on a bus and went to my mates house for a joint.
Done illigal bridge swings off of railway bridges and damns and abseiled away from the cops.
Climbed onto the roof of a moving steam train dressed as Indiana Jones walked along the carridge then climbed back in through a window, scaring the crap out of the people in there.
Then met the girl of my dreams, had kids settled down (a little) and lived happily ever after.

I pronounce it sawna. But I prefer when it’s pronounced sowna. I just think I I’m not nordic enough to pull it off without sounding like a twat.

I bought a sauna. Second hand from a guy who had it in his third floor attic 50 miles away. Had to dismantle it get it in the van than rebuild it on my lean to.
I then got myself a big old whiskey barrel for a cold plunge pool.
No regrets, a sauna straight after coming off the hill in wet weather is the best.

I started balding in my late teens. Shaved my head for the first time at 20. Never looked back. Wished I’d done it sooner.
Still remember an offhand comment from a girl who said I have a nice shaped head.
A quick once over with the clippers once a week and you’re good.
Whatever you decided to do don’t stress about it! I’m sure that will only make it worse.
Bonus: the freshly shaved head acts as velcro to keep your hat on during windy days!

I just finished ‘the year of the locust’.
It’s 85% good spy thriller and the last bit gets a bit weird.
Normally I love weird books but I felt like this one didn’t stay on its ‘track’. Still definetly recommend the previous book by the author ‘I am pilgrim’ it’s great.

If I recall correctly the fastest object ever was a manhole cover after an explosion. If it was sentient then it would be the fastest creature.
BRB, going to look up the incedent.
Edit: Here you go

Same, I made a more professional email address that was easier to tell people over the phone. I didn’t think at the time that my middle initials are A & T.
Now the confusion is I say my email addres is “firstname at lastname @ gmail.com”