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Joke’s on you, I’m like that at 47.
Only 30? I’m still waiting at 42…
I’m like this, but I always thought it was depression.
That is exactly how I described it to my therapist when I started really getting my mental shit together a few years ago… past 40.
There has been another recent meme that says something along the lines of “do you know they let you raw dog ADHD your whole life as long as you get good grades?” and that one hits even harder. I’ve described my childhood academic performance to a few of my medical professionals as “I was the kid who was threatened with getting kicked out of the gifted program because I didn’t do my homework.” And honestly I don’t think I remembered the assignments existed. I think that was the year I started using big fat daily planners.
And along those lines, while some of us are venting about difficulty getting treated: In past decades I’ve hauled my ass onto psychologist offices for an ADHD diagnosis and treatment. Well, I’ve always done well on cognitive tests. And you’d better believe that my Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria makes me hyper focus on those tests like a mother fucker. So being told you’re essentially too smart to have ADHD is frustrating as hell when you have failed university classes and gotten fired from grown-ass engineering jobs because of a crippling lack of executive function.
And I want to be clear none of this is supposed to be humble bragging. I’m just assuming that the audience on Lemmy is dense enough with similar computer nerds that others can probably relate when I describe it plainly. My brain is not one to envy — let’s just say it has lots of Simpson-esque “speed holes” thanks to other more significant medical shit, lol.
Edit to add: speaking of RSD, the first time I read about the strong link between ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, my entire god damned life made sense. Why yes, my life has also been defined by crippling social anxiety!
But the silver lining there is that I am able to make things a lot better for my son (8) who is exactly like me, and I can teach my wife about the brutally powerful emotions in situations that just don’t phase other people.
You don’t even have to get good grades if your parents kinda suck
Bro, are you me?
It doesn’t come across as a humblebrag. You’ve suffered all your life. Many of us have suffered. And only now is our society understanding what is happening in our head and making concessions to help.
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I don’t see the humble brag. If that’s what ADHD has been for you, why shouldn’t you be allowed to share it? But I’ve been in the exact same situation, so I might be biased. 😋
Lol literally me until a year and a half ago when my boyfriend told me he thinks I have ADHD.
Now I’m more like “tomorrow I will do my best and when it fails, I’ll try again”. It doesn’t really fix anything at all, but at least it has given me a tiny bit more peace of mind to finally accept that I don’t actually fail on purpose.
live your life to its fullest is overrated, cringe and government propaganda.
I don’t think it is, as long as you are the one deciding what “fullest” is.
It could even be spending the most amount of time possible with family and friends, or the most amount of time learning LOTR lore.
good point, i think i agree. i was half joking anyway, but on the other hand it’s also good to introspect from time to time to understand where my idea of “fullest” came from.
What do you call it when you finally admit to yourself that that obviously isn’t going to happen so you don’t even bother with the charade any more?
“…you’re
3050”37 just diagnosed. Knew it all the time.
I fucking wish I was 30
47, first time seeing a family doctor on the 30th, long road before diagnosis. And got an appointment for my finances. Now I need to make one for my teeth. I’m getting there.
If I can just keep at it a little longer.
Right?? The time stretching ahead of you like a vast unexplored country…
You become thirsty.
If only psychiatrists didn’t do literally everything in their power to make getting an appointment as hard as possible for people who have ADHD. Same goes for social anxiety.
Doesn’t really get much better at 50 either
it gets a lot better with treatment
Can Confirm
What’s the treatment? Adderal?
stimulants are a powerful tool for adhd treatment, more so than other MH disorders, but there are a lot of things that can be done: supplement behavioral change (think cbt) , support the needs of the lifestyle adhd brings (think “life hacks”) , address secondary effects such as learned shame (think trauma therapy) , and so on and so forth. oh and cant forget the importance of MBIs to actually improve executive functioning. I’m going to use the acronym for that one since what it stands for has become such a buzzword that it might turn you off, but it really is a remarkably powerful tool for adhd when done with proper guidance
What is MBI? Not everyone knows.
Will have to take your word for it as I am unable to get treatment at present
yeah I feel that. you can still read books though. I like “Driven to Distraction”. there’s also a decent YT channel called HowToADHD. Just try to use resources from trained clinicians or that woek closely with trained clinicians
You are young and life is long and there is time to kill today
And then one day you find ten years have got behind you
No one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun
Such a good song. Kind of fucked up to listen to on a morning commute tho xD
Used to love this song and listen to this band so much in my late teens/early 20s. I do remember with these lyrics wondering at that time if that’s how it would go. Funny to get to my 30s now and be like, “yep, hard relate”
Just working on diagnosis at 50. You’re lucky if you worked it out by 30.
I’m 53 and have been questioning it for a few years. I just have to make that doctor’s appointment to ask about it . That’s my goal for next week. It was also my goal last week, last month, and the last couple years… one day/week at a time.
After my morning coffee everything sounds like a great idea, but it’s too early in the morning to do anything about it because that window of time is designated peaceful quiet moment before I have to work. I’ll just do it this afternoon after work…
I just found out yesterday that I am Bipolar, have severe anxiety and depression, PTSD and likely ADHD but it’ll take a while to figure out cause they all have overlapping symptoms. Apparently I’ve been playing as a beginner on expert mode all along. Getting actual diagnosis for these things is a while thing unto itself where I live. It’s not real easy to get a psychologist unless you pay out of pocket. I don’t have money for that.
It took a long time. Had to quit booze. Straighten up my life some. Have a family to care about. Almost die from crazy cancer. Before I made the calls. Don’t beat yourself up too bad.
Got mine less than a year ago at 41. My whole fucked up life makes sense.
It’s crazy how it all makes so much sense that I’ve always wanted to just live in a cabin in the woods and exist.
Can’t say I haven’t had similar thoughts lately… use up my savings, sell all my shit (except video games probably lol), and just move out to rural Vermont or the Canadian wilderness or some shit, and opt out of this bullshit society for real. I know it’s easier said than done though…
I’m in that cabin. Slowly pushing the outside world as far away as I can get it, while maintaining access to hospitals and whatnot.
Just moved to far northern Maine, myself. It’s a house, not a cabin, but I have 10 acres of land, and almost nobody in Maine feels the need to fuck with you. Everyone wants to do their own thing, and be left alone, so everybody leaves everyone else alone. I feel like I have come home.
I’m your northern neighbor. I live in nowhere land on the east coast of Canada. A house/homestead on 250 acres of forest land. With another 250 acres behind me of just trees. We have a little hand built log cabin in the middle as a getaway and “retirement” pad so we can give the house to the kids so they have somewhere to live. I’m pretty solitary now as an old fella aside from my family.
It never changes either. I’m past 40 and I’m still like “I’ll get my life together next year. Or the one after that, surely!”
I mean yeah, last week(month/year) didn’t go as planned but this week(month/year) I will finally get my shit together
