An oldie, but a goodie

  • crackajack@reddthat.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    58
    arrow-down
    19
    ·
    1 year ago

    You can be angry without being rude. I’d much prefer passive aggressiveness than egregious blame-shifting and accusations.

    • oce 🐆@jlai.lu
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      49
      ·
      1 year ago

      You don’t need to be passive agressive either, you can just be polite and factual.

        • SchizoDenji@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          7
          ·
          1 year ago

          Exactly. I’ve worked under terrible managers and some great ones. Great ones get pissed off but they never, ever try and let emotions out. They were all to the point and knew what worked for every guy.

          • crackajack@reddthat.com
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            4
            ·
            1 year ago

            No, not at all. I appreciate that of her. She doesn’t even look scary when I’m being told off. Which is why I put the word angry in quotation marks. She tries to sound angry and look scary but we kind of brush it off. Not that I didn’t respect her authority.

    • voidMainVoid@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      20
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I hate passive-aggressiveness, because I want to know what people really think of me. How can you feel secure if you know that somebody might secretly hate you and is just waiting for the right time to put a knife in your back?

      • SchizoDenji@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        8
        ·
        1 year ago

        Both are bad IMO. Sometimes when morale is low, you don’t need constant berating to break your spirit.

      • onlinepersona@programming.dev
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        1 year ago

        Being polite doesn’t mean being passive-aggressive. I can tell you that I completely disagree with your opinion without calling you “a brainless ape that should’ve fucking stayed in school because your dumb ass cannot comprehend the simplest matters”.

      • wildginger@lemmy.myserv.one
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        1 year ago

        If you cant tell the difference between passive aggression and politeness, you gotta talk to someone about learning. Big big big difference there.

      • onlinepersona@programming.dev
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        6
        arrow-down
        4
        ·
        1 year ago

        If you can’t express yourself without expletives, it just means you have a small vocabulary or lack the maturity to express yourself without getting emotional, or both. It is a major sign of incompetence, unprofessionalism, and ignorance.

        Direct != being an asshole. If you don’t understand that, you have a lot to learn.

        • WoodlandAlliance@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          4
          arrow-down
          5
          ·
          1 year ago

          Are there any other words you’ve arbitrarily decided are a sign of lacking vocabulary?

          It’s pretty hilarious that you think limiting your vocabulary somehow expands it.

      • wildginger@lemmy.myserv.one
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        1 year ago

        Being directly a cunt actually causes sabotaging employees who work the minimum letter of the contract until they can quit via a text 5 minutes after start of day because they got another job lined up.

        Dumb managers poison the well by acting like this.

    • laurelraven@lemmy.blahaj.zone
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      Yeah, that’s a hard pass on passive aggressiveness, constructive criticism isn’t either of those things nor rude and angry ranting. Love Linus, but he really did need to chill out a bit more with these things. He could have gotten the same point across without coming across as yelling at the guy, just firmly pointing out that it was caused by the patch, the patch did things it shouldn’t ever do, and don’t break userspace or blame userspace programs

      • dumpsterlid@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        4
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        edit-2
        1 year ago

        Yeah this kind of attitude is never a productive strategy unless you want to surround yourself only with assholes. It also demonstrates a complete lack of ability to manage humans and keep your values straight when you become upset and stressed out, which is a massive red flag to hold up as someone running a project.

        In general it seems like a lot of people get into computers because they think it is a magic fantasy land where you don’t have to practice people skills and interact with other humans… when like every other industry after a certain seniority in a project it always, always, always comes down to managing humans and human interaction skills. The idea of the tech wizard programmer who can be an asshole because they are a genius at coding is just so tired at this point.