• kersploosh@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    183
    arrow-down
    6
    ·
    edit-2
    16 hours ago

    Dutch is not a language. The people who “speak” it are Germans who suffered severe head injuries. The place we call “the Netherlands” is a German hospital colony where those unfortunate people can live while they recover. That’s why it’s flat and everyone walks or rides bicycles; their head injuries make them unfit to drive cars or to manage difficult terrain.

    /s, please don’t send the actual Dutch after me.

    • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      41
      ·
      edit-2
      14 hours ago

      I am Belgian and live close to the border, I know plenty of them.
      Whatever they are they are not german.
      They have a soul, sometimes smile and have humor.
      And definite proof is that when one comes into the same room as you the temperature doesn’t drop significantly, also there is no detectable smell of sulfer.
      Definitely not german.

    • jackr@lemmy.dbzer0.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      72
      ·
      edit-2
      23 hours ago

      Het is te laat, je hebt de Nederlanders opgeroepen, makker. Bereid je voor op k o l o n i s a t i e.

      spoiler

      It is too late, you summoned the Dutch, mate. Prepare to be c o l o n i s e d.

      • sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        34
        ·
        23 hours ago

        Do you implement your healthcare system in your colonies? Also how likely are the colonizers to marry the locals and produce tall offspring?

        Asking for a friend.

        • Thekingoflorda@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          25
          ·
          22 hours ago

          First question: no, best we can do is force you to build dykes.

          Second question: we wouldn’t actually visit you, we would hire your neighbors to subdue you.

          • grue@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            7
            ·
            21 hours ago

            First question: no, best we can do is force you to build dykes.

            *dikes

            Then again, this being Lemmy maybe you meant it as written!

            • grysbok@lemmy.sdf.org
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              9
              ·
              20 hours ago

              Both spellings can mean wall for holding back water, and things spelled with a “y” are 20% cooler.

    • BakerBagel@midwest.social
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      36
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      22 hours ago

      The Dutch are simply swamp Germans, best left to their own ways. Much like the mountain Germans you find between Bavaria and Italy.

    • Stovetop@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      ·
      edit-2
      23 hours ago

      New theory: the reason the Hogeweyk concept was effectively implemented in The Netherlands is because the entire country is that concept.