At work when I have meetings I started talking in a really slow and monotonous voice. I think it makes people want to stop talking to me more quickly. I got the idea from an fbi hostage negotiator
Does it really work? Asking for a friend.
It’s me. I’m the friend.
I only recently started doing it
Read a journal article with coffee in the morning
Walking. Daily. That, and purchasing good shoes. It changed my life.
At first, I was in such a poor shape (physical and mental) I was barely able to walk more than a few steps, I was also severely ill and was expected to die quickly in not the most tranquil manner. Nowadays, I’m not dead :p, and I walk miles every day and I will do my best to go everywhere I can, walking. I’m still ill (it’s not curable) but it’s stabilized and I feel so much better.
I’m still not an athlete and I’m old enough to realize I’ll never be one but I don’t care: I’m in such a better shape! Both physically and mentally (I feel so much better in my head), my endurance is skyrocketing, and I’ve also lost so much weight I don’t need to wear ‘plus-sized’ clothes anymore.
And it all started by making the first step, one small step. Literally ;)
Edit: clarifications.
Great to hear. I wish you all the best.
Thx a lot.
I want to second this. I know it sounds crazy but walking has changed my life.
Doesn’t sound crazy to me the slightest ;)
Haha, of course not to you but I’m sure it does to some.
BTW, what do you consider good shoes? Any recommendations? I really struggle with this. For the colder and wetter part of the year I usually wear Salomon trail runners and I love their all-terrain, all-weather properties. They have one weak spot though - the heel counters wear out well before anything else in the shoe which overall seems rather indestructible. How did they fuck this up?!
But for the summer… I literally haven’t found a shoe which would be suitable for very long walks in various terrains and weather conditions and would be also breathable and light.
I have a dog that I walk every day for >10 years, and I can’t say walking in and of itself has changed my life in any significant way. Good shoes, however, massively have.
I tried at first but quickly realized I would not be able to walk without spending some money on quality shoes.
I started taking magnesium. Instantly the majority of my mental health issues evaporated but they come back if I go for more than about 3 days without it.
I tried magnesium and didn’t notice a difference. However I got my blood work done recently and found out I was low on B12. Started taking a B complex and it’s made a huge difference in energy levels.
It’s all about figuring out what your body’s missing :)
It’s a small thing, but I’d been feeling kinda gross about myself lately, and I started setting aside some time to just wear some cute lingerie around the house for no real reason once a week. My husband has started commenting unprompted how much he’s looking forward to “Sexy Sunday” and I kinda love it.
Choosing to be happy is the most important thing you can do in life. Good for you, and lucky husband.
It can be habit forming. Hope this changes someone’s life, it did mine.
Same! Got a wicked pair of boots and a new vest from the thrift yesterday. Cut my hair in the mirror, got decked out and my wife’s eye popped. Even my 12-yo was looking at me, uh, funny. Don’t think she knew daddy could dress like that! (She lives with her mom far away. Mostly sees me dressed up in “hiking with a shotgun” chic, not “metrosexual” chic.)
Anyway, I dress up for silly things just because it makes me feel good. Hell, I’ll use any excuse to wear one of my tuxes.
Off to see Superman in that same outfit!
I wouldn’t say really positive. But it changed a daily slightly negative into a daily slightly positive.
At work I regularly need to take short notes. I like to fill the page to the full. But it gets messier and more complicated aa the day goes on. So I’d strike through and cross out notes I don’t need anymore.
The thing is, crossing things out triggers a feeling of making mistakes. So instead of crossing out I started using check-marks (Dutch-style)., which feels like a succes and is also a quick fun flourish to draw. So small annoyances have turned into small victories.I found a slightly different system online once. You mark your todo list with a dash (-) in front. If it’s done, cross it to make a plus sign (+). If it’s something that you postponed or moved to another list/page, turn the dash into an arrow (->). I adapted it from the dash-plus system years ago: https://www.patrickrhone.net/the-dash-plus-system/
I gave up eating meat, because I think animals are gross and annoying. Did wonders for my health and weight. I’m still a miserable bastard though.
I went vegetarian 13 years ago. I lost a little weight in the beginning, then immediately gained it all back once I figured out what I liked. If being vegetarian makes you healthier, that’s a skill issue, considering pizza and ice cream can be vegetarian.
Seriously, though, congrats.
Around December my doctor told me my cholesterol and blood pressure was dangerously high. I have cut out about 95% of animal products out of my diet. I’m down to basically non fat greek yogurt. I refer to myself as an involuntary vegan.
I can’t stress enough how much this isn’t about will power but exploiting my depression for health benefits. It’s easy to get rid of things if all it does is make me happy.
Edit: Same philosophy applied to quitting cigarettes by going cold turkey a decade ago.
I randomly went full vegan after eating a Costco frozen lasagna one night. At the time I was drinking heavily, eating very poorly and pretty stressed out but something about the nasty beef crumbles getting stuck between my teeth set me off.
It’s been nearly six years and I wouldn’t go back to eating meat for the world. I wasn’t really an animal person but after marrying my wife and becoming very attached to her two chihuahuas my heart breaks that people can’t be bothered to stop eating meat. Animals are innocent and what we do to them isn’t right.
Learned Japanese on a whim so I could watch anime without subtitles. Now by complete coincidence I’m in Japan and not banging my head against the nearly insurmountable language barrier (Japanese people are really bad at English).
When I was in high school, I convinced my parents to sign me up for Japanese classes on the weekend because the sequel to my favorite game didn’t get translated. Didn’t end up getting all that far in it, my ADHD/autistic ass had a hard time paying attention in class and I had too much actual schoolwork to keep up with so I kinda just didn’t do the homework.
But last year I started getting back into it just for fun, and I am having a lot of fun learning. Helps that I can go at my own pace without any pressure from being in school anymore. Still a long way from 日本語上手, but I passed a N4 mock exam and I just ordered a shipment of books and manga to try and see how far I can get. Saving up to travel in a few years too.
In that case anime is your best friend. Well, and any other Japanese video content. Even with subtitles it helps your ears get used to the language.
I decided to start learning French last year and have been essentially speed running it. Learning another language makes my brain happy (I’m fluent in 2 already).
日本語は僕の好きな言葉ですでも、いま中国語を勉強している。
Small tip: でも can only be used to start a sentence; for connecting two halves of a sentence you should use けど or が depending on formality level.
Yeah I haven’t practiced/studied Japanese (on my own) since high school, oops.
Feeding pigeons first thing in the morning. I have a reason to get out of bed and something to look forward to every day.
It’s funny how we will do for others what we don’t do for ourselves. My sons sobriety began with a cat.
My sons sobriety began with a cat.
My healing journey also started with really being there for my cat. It might sound weird to the uninitiated but she’s taught me a lot.
do you keep a pen or just visit the locals that come to your neighborhood?
i like to hate on their calls, they can really take over when listening to bird songs
I live in the pedestrian zone of a semi large city. I feed them from my window and there are no other birds in the area that they could drown out. Except crows maybe but those are much louder.
that’s great
when my wife and I first moved to Seattle, we picked an apartment on the 3rd floor. The day after we moved in, we noticed a bird nest on the balcony. Turned out to be rock doves. It’s was fun watching them. They had two babies and we left them alone until they all stopped coming back before we cleaned up their mess.
good memories 🤙
New rule: only 1 “in progress” item and 1 “in repair” item is allowed on the hobby pile.
Turns out I actually have a LOT of things to do, and now I actually do it too.
The thought of this terrifies me. I should do it.
Damn, that’s a great idea.
Reading more, finally knocking down that bedside stack of books.
Excellent decision :)
I’m hoping desperately to do this in the winter.
No reading in bed, no phone in bed, just go and go to sleep. Also make my bed in the morning.
I expected it to have some kind of debatable impact after a while, but my insomnia cleared up instantly. Like within a couple of days.
Reading in bed is how I go to sleep lol
Walking regularly, reducing carbs intake, reducing alcohol intake.
I don’t have to be radical, it helps even when I sometimes go overboard on eating or drinking.
It also keeps my head leveled. Plus I get to listen to a lot of podcasts.
Started a garden and have stuck with it enough the garden is producing tomatoes (still green currently though)
I stopped adding sugar to my coffee at work. Took some getting used to, but it’s less hassle overall, and less sugar intake.
I did the same but with milk. My job at the time supplied coffee but not milk, the fridge was full of 1 pint bottles with names written on. There was never enough space. People got territorial over their 5sq inches of fridge. There was a milk club where they pooled together to buy milk for their group.
I couldn’t face dealing with that so opted out and drank it black. That was 15 years ago.
Some time later that employer realised they could solve a great many staff disputes for the low price of 20 pints of milk a week and started supplying it. No idea why it took so long.
imo sugar makes the bitter in coffee, overwhelming. I prefer it black or with a little oat milk. Oat milk has a pleasant mild sweetness that makes coffee just the right balance
my wife likes the sweater called Ez-Sweets and it’s ok but I only ever have a drop or two in tea
A little tiny pinch of salt in coffee can take the edge off the bitterness. It surprisingly doesn’t make it taste salty, just less bitter.
I have a weird sensitivity to bitterness, so for me, sugar removes the bitterness.
do you cream it?
if you just sugar it, there’s a threshold between way too bitter and just sweet enough. I don’t get it right so I just have something sweet to eat while enjoying the coffee
No, I never did cream.
