Cool-hwhip.
Hwaaaat?!
Let me axe you a question.
sure,
Axe ma boy!
Say whip, now say cool-whip
Ayessssss?
Do you not?
most importantly
… why tf not?
You must also slap the wrist repeatedly with an open palm should anyone go for a handshake. Don’t forget to roll your L’s and O’s as you say it. SALLLLLLLLMOOOOOOON!!!
SALLLLMOOOON
FORR-RREEEEEEEVV-VVAAAAAAAR!!!

People already do that. In the wrong word. Salmonella is pronounced just like Salmon. The L is silent!
As a non-native English speaker, sometimes it really feels like the language is just making fun of us.
As a native English speaker, I like that our language is fucking insane and it just owns it. No attempt, ever, to actually be consistent or logical.
French, on the other hand… It’s technically consistent, but it’s consistent in the most bizarre, wild, nonsensical way. “Mangeaient”, “mangeais”, and “mangeait” are all pronounced exactly the same. And all very similar to manger, mangez, and mangé.
Oh, and “mangerai” and “mangerais” are pronounced the same as each other, will frequently be used in completely interchangeable sentence structures, and mean notably different things. “Je mangerai”: “I will eat”. “Je mangerais”: “I would eat”.
Not anymore it ain’t!! We have permission! From Ickplant! saLmon it is!
What if we have a friend called Sal Monella?
Or alternatively, Sam O’nella?
samone’a
I remember an audio book read by Ice T and he pronounced the w in sword. It was a fantasy novel and it came up rather often.
Ha ha, I’m already ahead of you losers, I’ve been proudly pronouncing the K in Salmon this whole time.
SaLmon in the fish tacos, Hank!
Salmon is one of the most expensive fish types in my city especially when it’s not its season.
So last time I pronounced the L on purpose in the fish market. The guy bit his lip, looked at the ground for a second and replied “Yes we do have SALAmon… The best SALAmon… in the whole market for you sir.”
Inside I was like damn right I wanted a SALAmon and I’m getting what I paid for!
When you’re upper class you pronounce it with an Italian twist to make it sound more yummy: salmonella
Salmon She 😂
it was not supposed to be pronounched thus far?? lame!
Just like as in an “IsLand”?
Pronounce PF as “piff.” Example Pfizer as “Piffizer.”
Pf is pronounced “puff” by EEs.












