There isn’t really a point if you don’t want to do any work to get better. Not sure why you’re in asklemmy asking about why to live and then shooting down any ways to improve your life. And this is coming from someone with chronic treatment resistant depression

Get a job first. Sounds like you’re locking yourself in your room away from society. This is a recipe for depression.

Please don’t harm yourself. Do not let Trump or Putin live longer than you, they don’t deserve to beat you.

Why are you measuring yourself by the standards of a Hallmark movie?

If you think being successful and having sex with good looking people will make you happy, why is Beniffer getting divorced again? Does Elon Musk seem happy to you?

There is a concept in psychology called “adaptation” where over the long run, people maintain about the same level of satisfaction with their lives. Extraordinary fortunes like becoming paralyzed, or winning the lottery only effect this base-line of satisfaction temporarily.

Hi buddy 👋🏾 Same here mostly. I have given up on expecting anything out of life. I moved to a tribal village and am enjoying my remaining days there in nature.

I learned after being told countless times that failure is the only way to learn new things. I’ve found myself at the dark corner of life many times and I still do. I have a family and I love my kids but my wife has a hate relationship with me. At work I have to prove myself at every moment like I owe someone something. And I drive a small car so everyone feels the need to cut me off to feel better. But you know, there’s a place where you are king. Your imagination. I’m really artistic and creative due to constantly failing and always coming up with new things ala ADHD. I’m haunted by my father’s accusations about my expertise in starting things and never finishing them. Anyway, I keep myself entertained no matter what situation. I love observing people and taking photos and learning. Maybe go inside you and find what you like or find something you can win at. Visiting goodwill stores is very interesting for me for example. You can find all sorts of interesting things there. Or maybe nature could be interesting to you. I love love looking at things under the microscope at work for example. That stuff is like a good mine.

Solidarity and community. Which is both getting help and offering it in return.

I attend mental health support groups and participate in online spaces dedicated to my hobby. It keeps me feeling useful as a disabled adult.

That’s the struggle for all of us: how do we deal with the weight of our choices, how do we build a life worth living?

You’re going to have to forge your own path. The only wrong answer is to do nothing.

Eating mangoes while stoned

First off, thank you for reaching out. I lost two friends to self destruction, and I’d hate to see anyone else go down that path without any true understanding. You are loved, you are special, you are everything.

I see that you said you’re an old adult, yet in another comment you say you’re 35. That’s still quite young (I’m 47). You’ve got a long way to go, and believe me, it gets better with the right frame of mind. I would encourage you to start listening (or reading) to Alan Watts. The man saved my life (I was certainly on the precipice about 6 years ago), and not only that, but he helped me realize who I really am inside. There is a lot of his lectures on YouTube.

If you like lofi/hip hop, I would definitely check out Akira the Don’s Wattswave albums (II, IV, V, and VI), available on YouTube. It takes a lot of Alan’s works and summarizes them into easily-digestible beats. I started on IV, but II and V is my favorite.

From there, I listened to his other lectures as well as getting into philosophy, mostly Eastern, especially the Tao and Zen Buddhism. If that scratches an itch, here are some of my current favorites…

Books:

• The Book by Alan Watts
• Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu
• The Book of Five Rings by Musashi Miyamoto
• Dokkodo by Musashi Miyamoto
• Siddhartha by Herman Hesse
• Meditatons by Marcus Aurelius
• The Undiscovered Self by Carl Jung
• The Archaic Revival by Terence McKenna

Video:

• After Skool on YouTube
• Kurzgesagt on YouTube

Remember that you are loved, even if it’s just from a stranger on the internet.

This guy makes a new account every few weeks because he keeps getting banned. It is terrible to say given his question, but he is an attention whore and doesn’t want help. Best to ignore this.

When you are in better mental state consider studying some existential philosophy.

Otherwise, without improving your immidiate mental and financial conditions this is hard road to be on.

Point being over coming these issue is the crux of life. However, the regime ordered modern life in a such way that people start with varying degree of difficulty and sad reality that many people will never break out as current trend is more poverty and more mental health issues. So if you starting spot is shite or you got rockef by a life time event, you are trying to move a mountain.

With that said, either you yry help yourself and achieve some reasonable degree of comfort or not. Not much else.

But mental health start there, it takes a while. Finding peace in current conditions has to serve as foundation to be able to achieve a degree of economic security.

If you have a good friend, trying chatting with them but come into with a new approach hear them out let them poke some holes in your choices etc. Be adult. Make sure friend has good intentions and is competent enough to be an advisor.

Religion as last resort but you have to understand that it is just another shiti institution like a corporation… So got get yours and don’t get sucked into it.

I’m sorry man, I’ve been where you are. I entered a depressive state in my 20s, and it lasted for a decade. I’m 41 now and a happy person, I don’t know you, but here’s some advice based on my experience.

Don’t feel obligated to solve every problem you have all at once. I still have a pile of things that need a lot of work. You just need to get that sense of hope back, and that might just take 1 or 2 key adjustments. Money is the big one for most people, but working somewhere that isn’t soul-crushing is more important. Without knowing your situation, I’m guessing you either are unemployed or have a job that does not give you a sense of pride. That’s what I would advise improving asap. Even if it takes a pay cut to do it. If you are older, you will likely be promoted faster once you find something that grabs your attention. It may take a few jobs and a few failures, but that is normal. I recommend calling up some local tradesmen (plumbers, electricians, hvac, etc) to see if they need a helper. If you think you like it, there is great money to be made in those fields in just a few short years of training while still working. Hard work sucks but it makes you feel really proud of yourself every night.

I know you’ve read or been told this, but take time to walk around the block every day, make sure you shower every day, and try to eat a bit healthier. I don’t always follow this advice, but if I’m feeling depressed that’s my focus. It absolutely does help improve your mindset fast. Hiking a trail at a state park is a great double dip of exercise and nature immersion. Start with a 1 mile trail and work your way up. I personally love to kayak when it’s warm enough. Learn to cook chicken and rice, figure out your favorite vegetables, drink more water. It’s trite advice but it is 100% real.

Find a creative outlet that isn’t toxic. If you play games, avoid THOSE games. I deleted Call of Duty and Destiny 2. There are tons of positive, creative, cooperative games that can uplift you. Music is a great outlet. Every pawn shop has a $30 guitar. Learning how to play a song is a great confidence boost. Drawing is free and can be relaxing. Maybe you’re better at that than you thought after a few youtube lessons? Putting something new into the world that didn’t exist before is validating, even if no one experiences it but you.

I would also recommend you try to stop comparing yourself to other people. I deleted Facebook and cut out a few friends. There is nothing wrong with being who you are, whatever that may be, as long as you find your own happiness. Nothing else matters at all. There are millions of janitors in the world with a higher quality of life than your average image-obsessed workaholic-millionaire.

Lastly, I’d like to recommend doing something charitable for someone else for no reason. Sometimes if you can’t help yourself, it’s best to help someone else. It’s a great way to feel good about yourself and get a sense of progress, even if it’s someone else’s progress. You won’t regret it.

I hope some of this helps, best of luck man. I’m glad I made it through my dark times, and I bet you will be too.

I can think of three reasons, spite, funni, and to make things

My mantra for the dark days is “well, it’s not like I care, might as well stick around and see if something interesting happens”.

The things that make me enjoy life, certain people, good books, video games, positive world events, in a way even negative world events, as I am fascinated by humanity and our story, do keep happening.

There can he difficult periods in-between, and during them I just keep reminding myself that ending it is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

As for relationships, those are hard. There’s a chicken and egg problem there, where you have to be with people to learn to get people, but to be with people, you kind have to get people. So getting into it can be a huge pain.

It’s also very rewarding. And it is one of the things you can ABSOLUTELY find help with. Not from pickup artists, but just by asking people about it, and having conversations about hypothetical and real situations. Lots of people find the subject of people one of the most interesting there is, and while you’re at it, you’ll be developing your interaction skills.