• Passerby6497@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    ‘please, Internet, tell me how to turn my game controller into a vibrator’

    Kids these days… Back in my day, we just turned on FF8 and spammed summons

      • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        I imagine that’s a design consideration.- same with Ultima and other big spells. You get a big payoff after a big wind-up. It’s trying to telegraph that if you want speed you should build your party differently using junctions

      • DragonTypeWyvern@midwest.social
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        9 months ago

        ?

        Bro you spammed limit breaks in that game, tell your kid self to git gud

        FF7 was the unrelenting Summon Fest once you got mimic and w-summon

      • Rai@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        9 months ago

        At least there was button tapping to power up so there was SOMETHING to do during the forever animations

    • ButteryMonkey@piefed.social
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      9 months ago

      You missed out on the tomb raider demo disc that came with PlayStation magazine (probably issue 73 based on the fact I have it and I wasn’t subscribed very long while demo discs were a thing) Same era.

      If you went for a swim in the pool, and swam into the side, you’d not only get a constant intense vibration, you’d also get to see her swimming motion, and I don’t think it had breath mechanics yet (or at least she wouldn’t die in the demo zone), so you could take your time. Win win.

      There was also a vibration test in the menu if you just wanted no frills.

    • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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      9 months ago

      Kids these days… Back in my day, we just turned on FF8 and spammed summons

      pre-teen me spamming Shiva.

  • peoplebeproblems@midwest.social
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    9 months ago

    So this brings up a funny story.

    IDK when, but I was on a trip, thinking about my ex wife(then girlfriend at the time) with my parents somewhere and they had these vibrating back massager things. Usually they’re like 4 wooden balls on sticks attached to a wooden handle. I knew how much my ex loved it. Anyway I thought “dude fucking brilliant” and I bought it for her and my parents were like: “Uh, ok? You sure she’s going to like that?” “I’m like are you kidding me? The number of times I have to get sore hands from giving her a back massage is incredible!” Oh, I’m like 15 at the time.

    Well, I gift it to her, and with the smallest hint of embarrassment says she absolutely loves it. That night she thanks me again, saying it made things so much easier, in kind of a flirty tone. I completely miss all social cues always so this didn’t register. Sometime later I come over and she wants one of the back rubs, and I’m like “hey, grab that tool I got!”

    She responds with “I’m not in the mood for that, besides it’s out of batteries.”

    I thought I was going to fold into myself. “How many back rubs have you given yourself?” “Oh, like none. Just the fun stuff.” The heaviest levels of cringe hit, knowing how many people saw me buying this for my girlfriend completely oblivious to what it would be used for.

  • Karyoplasma@discuss.tchncs.de
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    9 months ago

    They don’t do that because the controller chip will cancel vibration after a while. The reason for that is exactly what you would imagine people used it for.

    You’d need to mod the controller with a custom chip.

    • Korne127@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      The reason for that is exactly what you would imagine people used it for.

      That does not make absolutely any sense at all. Why would they care about what people in private use controllers for? Why would they care enough to actively program something preventing that?

      • Miles O'Brien@startrek.website
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        9 months ago

        It’s Sony, a Japanese company.

        Why would they care about what people in private

        Lol. Lmao, even.

        Sony cares a bit too much about how people use the things they own that Sony made.

        Japan is famous for its laws and customs regarding nudity, sex, porn, accessories, etc… Anything you might expect a stereotypical prude to clutch their pearls over, really. It’s simply gasp too obscene!

        • MajesticTechie@feddit.uk
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          9 months ago

          Sony: “How dare you even think about using our controller for that”

          Hitachi: “Have I got a product for you”

          • boonhet@sopuli.xyz
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            9 months ago

            Hitachi ceased production of the device in 2013 due to concerns about having the company name associated with a sex toy. Vibratex convinced the company to continue manufacturing it under the name “Original Magic Wand,” omitting the Hitachi name. In 2014, the company used the name “Magic Wand Original.”

        • KoalaUnknown@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Japan is famous for its laws and customs regarding nudity, sex, porn, accessories, etc… Anything you might expect a stereotypical prude to clutch their pearls over, really. It’s simply gasp too obscene!

          That really isn’t the case though. Love hotels, “gentlemen’s clubs”, and other adult institutions are heavily advertised, and sex toys can be found almost anywhere – drug stores, superstores, even connivence stores.

      • Pechente@feddit.org
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        9 months ago

        It matters as soon as people record themselves using it „wrong“ or tutorials go viral. Especially for a company that is really concerned about its public image like Sony.

      • iAmTheTot@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        I don’t know if OP’s claim is true, but I could see a company doing that to try and prevent unintended uses so to prevent damage/malfunction.

    • passepartout@feddit.org
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      9 months ago

      Didn’t know that. I would have guessed the reason is to save battery or stop annoying people when it isn’t within reach / you can’t turn it off.

    • jaaake@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      How long is “a while?” I added this to a game but never tested it beyond a few minutes. The player can toggle it on or off, it is intended to stay on until toggled off as I did not add a timer to it.

      Also, if there is a restriction at the firmware level, I suspect the reasoning would be as more of a safety measure to prevent excessive motor wear or battery drain.

      • kadu@scribe.disroot.org
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        9 months ago

        Here in Brazil there’s a famous brand of chocolate called Baton. The chocolate sells well in general, but lots of kids ask for their eggs during Easter, and they usually come with toy cars or action figures or a water gun or whatever.

        In one particular Easter, the eggs came with a toy that was a long cylinder with a smaller, rounded tip at one end.

        This cylinder had just one feature: it vibrated a lot when you turn it on.

        It also came with a minuscule pen, with almost no ink, you could attach to the device. Their explanation was that it was a fun vibrating pen toy. When asked how’s a pen that vibrates any fun or useful, they had no answer, and why the device was significantly larger than the actual pen, also no answer.

        So for Easter that year, kids got a penis-shaped vibrating toy… And a pen.

        Who doesn't love a good old vibrating pen!

        • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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          9 months ago

          In the US in the 90’s there was a pen, IIRC it was marketed as the Squiggle Writer, which was basically that. Fairly large plastic pen that had a vibrator at the far end, and interchangeable ballpoints that could be slotted into the writing end. When running, as you wrote with it it would cause the pen to draw little loops.

          It was a plausibly deniable sex toy.

    • Swedneck@discuss.tchncs.de
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      9 months ago

      it’d also actually be made to be on for extended amounts of time, with a proper big vibration motor.
      if you try to use a controller like this i’d bet it’ll burn itself out in an hour…

  • ordnance_qf_17_pounder@reddthat.com
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    9 months ago

    Sony should sell their own vibrators. Like a DS5, but everything cut off except for the grip to hold the vibration motor and the Dpad to adjust the settings.

    • LePoisson@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      My initial Google search with Gemini says neither Sony nor their subsidiaries produce adult novelty vibrators.

      However, I would be willing to bet money the same vibrating motors in their controllers are in a vibrator somewhere without knowing more details about how that tech is sourced. I could be wrong but I like to think somewhere someone is using the same vibrator to rub one out as the one in a PS5 controller.

  • To be fair, having recently been on the market for a proper vibrating sex toy, they’re expensive as fuck, and according to my ex-wife (ow. ex- still stings.) capable of providing mind-blowing orgasms. So yeah, for those without a budget, we make do with what we got, or the bargain bin at Good Vibes.

    TMI:

    spoiler

    The item in question doesn’t figure into why she’s ex- now, but the reason we were on the market for one absolutely does. I’ll be talking to an endocrinologist at the end of the year.

    • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      They’re not more than a new controller for the basic rabbit style vibrating ones. Controllers start around $60 in USA. I could be off, I got two Xbox controllers a few years ago to play couch games via steam, I don’t own a console.

      • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
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        9 months ago

        Presumably Op already have the controller though. Hence the question about how to JO with it instead of asking for suggestions on what vibrator to buy.

        • thermal_shock@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          I was kinda talking for the future when it burns out. I don’t think they are normally used in an “on” position for super long periods of time. I could be wrong. But vibrators aren’t super expensive.

  • ouRKaoS@lemmy.today
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    9 months ago

    I remember when the Xbox360 released their little indie game section there were multiple “controller vibration tests” that were like a dollar.

    I had proper equipment by then, but I could see the appeal for someone who was in a different situation.

    • Prox@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Hilariously, the actual Cyberpunk game would work for this. There’s a weapon in the game that’s just a giant dildo, and holding it causes your controller to rumble continuously.